Theory of ‘Relativ(e)’ity

An Indian wedding provides a purrrrfect opportunity to study the Theory of ‘Relativ(e)’ity. One gets to meet all sorts of relatives duringthe course of events – mama, mami, chacha, chachi, taya, tai, bua, foofa(generally pronounced by an average Indian as “phoopha“), long lost badi and chhoti dadis and nanis, and the list goes on ; and the best part of it is, that every relative of yours finds you much more grown up than expected, coz the last time they saw you, “uss waqt toh tum bahut chhote the”.. Hello !! What did they expect? That they’ll get wrinkles all over their face and we wont grow an inch !! Actually they expected to see the same old li’l kid trodding on the back of his/her toy horse and singing “chal mere ghode tik-tik-tik”… Aah ! Only wanna say that I’m NOT sorry for not meeting your expectations 😀

Recently, I was honored to be a part of The Great Indian Wedding *sigh* It was a cousin.. err.. no-no.. a cousin’s wife’s brother.. YES ! It was my cousin’s wife’s brother who got married to a girl of his parents’ choice.. Lucky Chap :D.. (and yayy… got the relation to that guy correct, FINALLY :D)

As was expected, I came across a lot of kinsmen and kinswomen there. Some i was acquainted with, some I came to know there and then, that they too existed. With all of them around, I was bound to have many “uss waqt toh tum bahut chhoti thi” encounters. Here’s one of them where the other person was set to walk over my dreams.. have a look..

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Day1, Function # 1, Sai Sandhya

There was a lady, my mom’s 179345th cousin i guess. My mom called her ‘Rani Didi’.

R : Excuse me beta, aap unki (pointing towards my mom) beti ho?

Me : jee aunty..

R : Hey bhagwaan.. toh tum ho Noni (yeah thats my nickname *blush*)..

Me : jee aunty..

R : kitni badhi ho gayi hai.. pichhli baar jab maine tujhe dekha tha toh tu bahut chhoti si thi..

Me : err.. aapne pichhli baar mujhe kab dekha tha aunty?

R : ermm… tab tu shayad 1 saal ki thi..

Me (to myself): No wonder.. main toh sach mein tab bahut chhoti thi..

I just smiled and the conversation was taken forward.

R : ab tum kitne saal ki ho?

Me : bas 20 complete hone waale hain..

R : kyaa 20 ????

Me(to myself, wondering) : where’s the shock element in this statement?

R : itni badi ho gayi hai aur ab tak mummy-papa ne shaadi ke baare mein bhi nahi socha ??

Me(to myself, cursing) : CRAP !!

Me(to Rani aunty) : err aunty abhi toh main bahut chhoti hoon.. aur vaise bhi ahi main padh rahi hoon.. achha main abhi aayi.. papa bula rahe hain..

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Apart from your age, another thing which interests your relatives the most is your area of study, whether or not they are aware of it, they are bound to ask you about it and give their own comments. here’s my encounter # 2 regarding the same.

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Day 2, Function # 2, Mehendi Ki Raat

The person I interacted with, on this day, on the above-mentioned topic, was not known to me. My cousin introduced us both. She was my cousin’s wife’s… errr… i dont remember and i’m not interested either 😛 All i know is that her name was, is and always will be, Amrita.Here’s the conversation that took place between us.

A : Hii.. how are you?

Me : I’m fine.. what about you?

A : I’m also fine.. so.. what are you doing?

Me : err.. (jokingly) I guess I’m attending the party…

A (laughing heartily over this PJ) : HAHAHAHA… I mean what are you doing these days? Whi course are you pursuing?

Me : Ohh that ways.. well I’m pursuing Engineering..

A (looked a bit shocked) : ohh.. woww.. not many girls take up engineering.. I mean 95% of the girls are scared of this field..

Me : I know.. but I belong to the rest 5%..

A : What all do you do in an engineering college?

Me (pondering over the question) : Well… jhelofy Mr.Vohra, Mr. Markand and the likes.. try to perform experiments in the labs without any instrumets provided.. devise whole new ways of pursuing our hobbies while sitting in the class, and still managing to look attentive and interested in the lecture.. bunk a whole lot of lectures and tutorials, and yet achieving that 50% attendance mark..

A (interrupting in between my thoughts) : err.. Is it interesting? Or is it tough?

Me : huh??… ohh.. I think Engineering is interestingly tough 😀

A : ok.. so do you enjoy your college?

Me : yes.. very much.. err i need to go.. my cell’s ringing.. excuse me..

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Day 3 , Function # 3, The Big Day itself – The Wedding Day (not mine)

A lot of interesting conversations took place that day also, majority of which I dont remember (thanks to the short-term memory developed while studying in the “Engineering College“), and the rest of them, I’m not willing to write. This means that I’m signing off now.

Till my next serene blog, go and enjoy the Great Indian Wedding and have a go at this Theory Of Relativ(e)ity !!

Nidhi

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  1. Nidhs lovelyy and such a true post..Haha not only shaadi even when they come to ur house they will be like..Bahut bade ho gaye..As ifffff sirf wahi bade ho sakte hain and we shuld remain d same..Loll…

    But m sure u enjoyed d wedding…hehe

    Love anku

    • ankit govil
    • July 16th, 2009

    the following conversation is pertaining to instrumentation students only.happens to me in every shaadi,reception,mundan etc….

    uncle or aunty:are beta tum to vo ho na…sarojini nagar walon k bete…
    me:yeahh(so u dnt remember anyone in my family by name)
    u/a:kya kar rahe ho beta aajkal,engg?kahan DCE se?
    me:naah.not frm dce. frm bvp.in instrumentation & control .
    u/a:kisme?ohh instruments mein. bhautrachha course hai beta .very lucky.mere bhai ke sale ki beti ne bhi yehi kiya hai.instrumentation and diet control..hmm.very bright future.
    me:yeahh… right.thats wht im doing too..thanks

    • nidoo
    • July 20th, 2009

    @ Anku – I knowww…

    @ Ankit – Sarojini Nagar Waalon ke bete and Instrumentation and diet control… they stole the show! Literally!

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